Downward Spiral

I've been thrown out of rhythm on a downward spiral due to my stubbornness on some people's meddling ways. I guess I'm not comfortable with all those wasted times spent on endless meetings. I never really developed a momentum to get things done and I hated every part of me free falling out of control and indecisive on things to do. It's a bit odd that I'm back to being out of my comfort zone and lost someplace else again and so soon. I still have a lot to think about on how to be on better terms consistently.

The redeeming value for the week was that I was able to resolve some short term problems with a very creative approach. My creative juices are at its peak when I'm allowed the leeway to think and find ways. I'll try to maneuver more breathing room in the next few days for me be able to be more adaptive to the situation.

Things are being shaken up and shaken up fast and I do believe that these changes has been long-time coming now. I am just torn on whether I should once again choose to take more time in plotting success in the work place or just go on and take a leap of fate and move on to something new. I do now have a bailout plan and that also means me saving a bit to have some financial breathing room to more options in the next few years.

I managed to book a getaway a few weeks from now, which would be followed by another trip to China so I might be gone for a while and squeeze in some time to think things through. I do try to think on what options are there but sleep has been the more viable option. Somehow, I've managed to adjust my sleeping hours and I've been dozing off earlier than usual. I hope this doesn't mean old age... => Come to think of it, I might need the sleep to allow my body to heal since I've been so prone to being sick as of late. The burn out days have been catching up.

Maybe it's the burn out that increases the propensity to go on those downward spirals but I have hit the breaks from skidding. Maybe I'll slide down a bit further or maybe I'm on my way up but that's something I leave for the future to decide on and just believe - believe that I'm on a Downward Spiral - no more. =>